That Internet Problem

Lately, I’ve been having an internet problem. Okay…okay…the people who I “borrow” it from have been having an internet problem. In any case, the service has been unreliable, so I’ve been living it up in air-conditioned cafes, sucking down sugary caffeinated drinks and filling up on overpriced, caloric pastries. Yesterday, I spent $7,000 pesos to finish my homework and intermittently chat with friends.

I was complaining about it last night and my fiancé was like, “But isn’t that a good thing? Don’t you like going there? Isn’t it a treat for you?”

That may have set me off on a tirade. I may have started gesturing wildly and saying that, “They don’t give that crap away for free! You have to, like,  eat to keep your seat!”

I feel like Lucy in the I Love Lucy episode where she goes to Schwab’s Drugstore to be discovered like Lana Turner and has to keep ordering milkshake upon milkshake upon banana split to keep her seat. She returns later, a sick bloated mess. That was me. (Note: Try as I might, I could not find that scene ANYWHERE online.)

The curious part of the coffee shop equation is that I feel so professional. I sit typing away at my computer in actual clothes – not pajamas – with my hair combed, and a splash of makeup on my face. I look over at other “professionals” busily working, and not at my neighbor who vacuums his balcony in his underwear. Everyday. And, I feel like I could do this, you know, write professionally.

I have had some paid writing positions, but they come and go. Mostly, I entertain myself through this blog and terrorizing my classmates with my comments in our forum discussions . My mom used to say to me that someday when I write the screenplay of my life, we will all be able to retire. I just laughed.

But, sitting here, I feel like it could happen. What is that? Is it the funky, eco, polished decor, or the sleek-looking businessmen and women who sit here to discuss important things? Maybe it’s because in the U.S. writers clack out their masterpieces in Starbucks. It might also help that my horoscope indicated that February is the perfect month for me to begin my novel/autobiography/ autobiography written with generous artistic liberty. (Sometimes, I believe in that horoscope hocus pocus.)

Hey, it worked for Lucy! After her endearing attempt at fame, she was offered a part in a movie. 

It could happen…

P.S. We are getting internet! It’s called “naked” broadband. What happened to “clothed” internet? Is all internet exhibitionist these days?

16 responses to “That Internet Problem

  1. “Okay…okay…the people who I “borrow” it from have been having an internet problem.”

    This brought a smile to my face, thank you :-)

  2. Great opening to the post! You have a really engaging writing style.

  3. Your fiancé? I think I missed something…

    P.S. Glad your internet problem is being solved.

  4. studiovalparaiso

    “Lich-ear” internet es lo mejor (pero ilegal!!!)….solía quejarme igual que tu hace mucho tiempo del wifi de mi vecino, y también iba a los cafés con mi laptop a dibujar(me hacía ver y sentirme como un diseñador/ilustrador mas que profesional, más bien “cool “) y usar el wifi aunque (jamas me gaste 7 lucas en consumo por usar internet en algun lugar) , ahora tengo internet en el cel y mi vida cambió, dibujo menos, salgo a recorrer los cerros que no he visitado aún, saco más fotos y estoy armando recorridos para ser guía :D es divertido y podría ser guía profesional y ganar plata por recorrer los cerros a pie :D

    entretenida entrada :D


  5. Haha, this sounds so familiar. I was complaining about having to go to cafes because of crappy internet to my husband before and he was like, “But you LIKE going to the cafes, don’t you?” Yes, yes, I love eating pastries, drinking coffee, and sitting in cafes. The problem is that I always feel obligated to buy so many things because I’m there so long and the waiter keeps coming by to ask me if I need anything else. So, I just keep ordering and ordering. I always feel guilty afterwards.

    Have you ever considered self-publishing?

    • I have thought about it, like an ebook, you mean? Yes, I know of some people who have done that and it’s an easier route to take. I’m still thinking about it.

  6. Yea, e-book. You could also self-publish in print but it seems pointless considering how cheap it is to self-publish electronically and how popular Kindle and other e-readers are nowadays.

  7. Have you tried media bistro?

  8. Pingback: Bad Internet Karma |

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